How Do I Appear To Others?

How Do I Appear To Others?

We all live in our own shell and we seldom take time to see how we present ourselves to others or how others might perceive us.

This is important, not only in terms of the social aspects of how we run our lives but also for the duties we perform in the workplace.

So, how can we be more perceptive about the outward-facing us? One approach is to consider the following approach and ask yourself some challenging questions:

  1. Status: Our relative importance to others. How do we fit into the group(s) that we are a part of? If you are a Manager how does this work, do you use this status in a negative or a positive way? Do you throw the status of the role to one side and get on with the group as a peer or advisor rather than running everything? How does your Team see this?
  2. Certainty: Our being able to predict the future. Can you tell what is around the corner, what the next challenges will be and if so are you ready for them? If not are you resilient enough to deal with the unexpected? Do those around you have faith in your ability to do this?
  3. Autonomy: Our sense of control over events. Can we shape what is going on and if not should you begin to try to gain some measure of control? Successful people always manage to have at least an awareness of how to get this and inspire and motivate those around them by being unconcerned when a big problem emerges, looking calm and measured.
  4. Relatedness: Our sense of safety with others. How comfortable are you around people and how connected to them are you? If this is a game that you play, where there is very little by way of actual Relatedness you will sooner or later be found out for being at least insincere or possibly even manipulative in your approach!
  5. Fairness: Our perception of fair exchanges between people. Do you work collaboratively and with a common purpose with those around you or does your style or approach lean towards making the most from social or working relationships? Care is needed here to ensure that at least you have a strong degree of fairness and equity in your social and working relationships!

Good Luck!

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